I have learned a lot of things over the duration of my life. Some of those things include how to buy ice cream from a grocery store, that if you are tall you are going to hate washing your hair in a hotel shower, and that (Spoiler Alert) Santa Clause is really just a festively dressed drunk guy that sneaks into your house to steal your cookies and take a dump in your stocking. That isn't really coal my friends.
Today I learned yet another life lesson. I live in an apartment with a swamp cooler. For the past month the stupid thing has been squeaking, and it got to the point where I had completely tuned it out. Unfortunately for my roommate he didn't have the luxury of having that annoying noise tuned out. We had talked about filling out a maintenance report, but I am lazy and well yeah laziness always seems to win when it comes to mild annoyances. Anyway, so after a month of this squeaking noise the maintenance guy comes along, and notices that incessant squeaking coming from our swamp cooler. He gets some tools and spends about 20 minutes fixing it, and I didn't have to do anything. My point is that if you wait long enough eventually someone will come and fix your problems if you are too lazy to fix them. Sure, if you take care of your problems at the very beginning it is a lot faster, but how cool is it that you can just sit back and do nothing and eventually someone else will come fix everything for you? It is kinda like when a parent or sibling tells you to do a chore of some sort and you say that you will do it in a minute, but then that person gets impatient and does it instead. It is like the universe protects lazy people with people that do stuff. I can't tell you how many times in my life I just let things go until they work themselves out. Like this one time the garage door in my town home broke, because of an error in judgement and a lack of space to park in front of it. Because it was kind of awkward to tell the rental management that it happened we just let it go and dealt without a functioning garage door for the rest of the time we were there. Once moved out we got the entirety of our deposit back, and no one was the wiser. Something else that is kind of amazing is with food. If you go to some kind of social gathering where food is involved and just sit there without eating people will start offering to get you food. I am constantly amazed by the magic of doing nothing, and that is why I wanted to pass this on to you my readers. I believe that if we all start to do nothing and wait for the universe to unwind in our favor we will all die and the world will be a better place, because people are terrible and they ruin the world with their stupidity and freaking hashtags in front of words that are somewhat related to what they are talking about. I blame hashtags for the drop in intelligence and rise of teenage pregnancies in our modern world. It all started with Jersey Shore and The Hills and all of those other shows that are all dramatic and terrible. I am pretty sure that half of the human race is beginning to evolve backward. Their brains are getting smaller and their ability to fight a sabertooth tiger is increasing because of their 6 day a week training regiment. Anyway, I have to go get pizza now, because unlike those other people I turn caffeine and pizza into productivity and cool technology stuff.
Bye now!
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