Have you noticed all these frozen yogurt places? It would be difficult not to, they are everywhere. I really don't understand the whole craze about these places. They are over priced and half of them you have to make your own. I don't know about the rest of you, but I go out to eat so that people can serve me. I am not paying to make my own food while the people behind the counter just sit there and make money while they watch me work. I am not a slave!!!! Then I get to the cash register and they charge me 5 bucks. Are you kidding me? I just got 12oz of fro-yo (that's what the hip youngsters are calling it these days). Another reason that I am not fond of them is because everyone says that one is better than the other. Which doesn't make sense. I am certain that there is only one company that sends the mix to every store. From what I have heard there are two places that are pretty much the same except for their location...Menchies and Krave. Strange thing is that everyone thinks that one is better than the other. It would make sense if most people said that one was better than the others, but it's about half and half. Why don't you health freaks just calm down and go get some ice cream. Do you really think fro-yo is better for you than ice cream? Ha, I bet you still think that santa clause is responsible for your presents on christmas, and that the easter bunny is pooping out eggs in random places for you to find. The truth is the health food fad is really a government conspiracy to make money from the idiots in America and slowly kill them. They charge you extra money for "healthy food" to pay for all the money they have borrowed from China, and on top of that they lace all the food with small amounts of arsenic. If you want to have real healthy food why don't you get off your lazy butt and grow a garden and buy some cows and chickens to slaughter? Oh, I forgot you live in America and don't know what those things are.
So I had an interesting experience tonight that I would like to share with any who want to read about it. I went and saw Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 2. I am pretty sure that is the longest title for a movie ever. I could be wrong, it just seemed like it took me a long time to type it. If I was smart I would have typed "Ha" into google and just copied and pasted it from the search results. Unfortunately, I didn't think of that until after I typed it. Just to warn you I am going to give away the entire movie with this post. So if you haven't seen the movie or read the book Dumbledore dies...jk he really dies, but just in the 5th movie, or the 6th one. Well the real one died after like the 2nd or 3rd, but that is beside the point. The movie wasn't bad. I can't complain I got to see Emma Watson looking hot for 2 hours, and I had some good laughs because unlike most of the people that are into Harry Potter I can get a good laugh when a character dies. Like after Harry dies and Voldemort says "Harry Potter is dead" then he laughs a little bit then his entire mob starts laughing. I nearly died laughing. It never really explains how Harry was able to come back from the dead...oh well. Then after he comes back from the dead he defeats Voldemort and finds out he is the rightful owner of the elder wand. So he literally could have power over death and become the most powerful wizard in the world. What does he do? Breaks it and throws it off a cliff, and before he "dies" he drops the stone that brings people back from the dead in the middle of the forest. What a moron! If I had that kind of power I probably wouldn't do much. At the very least I would probably bring Heath Ledger back from the dead, make myself a bunch of delicious food every day, and use the cloak of invisibility to go into the girls bathroom...to find out once and for all if there is really a couch in there or if people were just making it up.
So back to the movie. My experience in the theater was awful. I got in there and it was like 100 degrees. Then I look up at the screen and there is some light or something hanging from the ceiling right in front of the top left of the screen. I could not stop looking at it for the first 5 minutes of the movie, and every time my eye wandered up to that part of the screen I would start laughing. Then close to the end of the movie some idiot opened the door to the projection room and left it open. So there was a huge glare on the screen. It was ridiculous. Some how with all of that going on I actually enjoyed the movie. Of course I was laughing more than anything else. There are just so many things in that movie that my mind added to make it awkward or just random. And there were just a bunch of funny deaths where people just got owned by something. Like Snape, he totally gets owned by Voldemort's snake, and I couldn't help but chuckle. I am pretty sure that the fact that Snape is a good guy is just something that J.K. Rowling added at the last second just to mess with people. To be honest with a name like J.K. I would expect something like that, and it turned out to be J.K. Snape is a good guy. The best joke would be if on the very last line of the book she said "J.K. Harry is really dead! Take that you lifeless nerds."
Avada Kedavra!
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Saturday, July 23, 2011
My thoughts on Captain America...and some other thoughts
Ok it is definitely time to blog again. You wanna know how I can tell? Because I am bored out of my mind. I have had quite an interesting week actually. On Sunday night I went to my friend Keean's house and played games with some friends I haven't seen in a long time. It was actually quite enjoyable. Unfortunately, I had no idea that on that night my phone would meet it's demise. Later that evening on my drive home I tried to text someone with my touch screen on my LG enV Touch. Alas, the screen didn't work. I wasn't surprised, the phone had been giving me trouble since about 3 months after I got it. That was about a year and a half ago. Anyway, I just figured I could restart it and it would work again. I was wrong. I could have lived without the touch screen working because the touch screen barely worked anyway. The fact that they called it a touch screen was generous. It was more like a useless screen. After restarting the phone and realizing that the screen didn't work any more I also noticed that the screen light was staying on. If I completely locked the screen it would light up a second later. This caused the battery to die extremely fast. So here I was late Sunday evening trying to figure out what I was going to do now. To make a short story long, I sat up that night thinking about getting a new phone. So I contacted my sister and told her about my stupid dead phone and that I wanted to get a new one. Ok, I am gonna make the story short. I got an iPhone 4! I do not regret the purchase at all. It is the best thing ever. I really like apple products. They are far superior to any other product. I didn't get on here to talk about my iPhone though. I could, but I don't want to bore you.
Isn't it weird how if you wake up 5 minutes earlier than normal you are like 30 minutes early for work or school? Seriously, When I am in the middle of a semester I will wake up with my alarm clock and get ready with the same routine every day, but I will get to school literally right before it starts, or a little after. If I get up 5 minutes earlier I am 30 minutes early for school. How is this possible? I was talking to a friend about this last week, and he said the same thing happens to him. So I know I am not alone on this. If you haven't tried this I suggest you do. It is miraculous. It is like there is a void in time in that 5 minutes before you normally wake up. It is my belief that the key to time manipulation lies in that 5 minutes. There is some sort of supernatural phenomenon in that small window of time that needs to be scientifically studied. Oddly enough, I didn't get on here to talk about that either.
I saw Captain America twice this weekend, once in 2D and then in 3D. For those of you who haven't seen it, I strongly suggest that you do. Not only is it awesome, it is awesome! There is a preview for The Amazing Spiderman and that promises to be a good movie. I did like the other spiderman movies but they were a little corny for my taste. And the new one looks like it will be following the way the comics were. One of the amazing things about Captain America was the way they were able to make Chris Evans look like a shrimp. The first 20 minutes or more of the movie he is scrawny and short. I was reading up on how they did that, and based on what I read they actually filmed him normally and shrunk him down in the post production. Originally, what I thought they did was have a small guy and put Chris Evan's face on him, but I was wrong. It is incredible how good it looked though. They did a really good job with that in this movie. I would have liked to see a little more of Captain America kicking butt, but I was definitely ok with the amount they had. Honestly, I don't think I could have been fully satisfied by any amount of action they could have had in this movie. I would have just wanted more. One thing I didn't like was that the love story isn't resolved, but there aren't many movies like that and I think that they will take care of that in The Avengers...hopefully. Besides that I loved the movie.
One thing I still cannot understand is people that leave before the credits are over in a movie like that. Are you kidding me? That is like reading a book and putting it down before reading the last page where it wraps everything up. That is actually a bad analogy for me because I don't read books, but still. It is common knowledge that movies like this have stuff after the credits. If you don't know that then you shouldn't be allowed in public because obviously you are an idiot. Oh, I thought of another analogy, it's like eating a candy bar and throwing away the last bite...who does that? What I am trying to say is that if you are gonna see Captain America stay through the credits because there is something that you will want to see at the end.
So obviously people on facebook don't appreciate pure gold when it comes to humor. My facebook status for 3 days has been "So wait...is xXx gonna be in The Avengers?" Obviously, no one gets it because I have no comments or likes on my status. Samuel L. Jackson plays Nick Fury in the recent Marvel movies. He also plays the guy that recruits Vin Diesel in xXx. Do you get it now? It's not funny now that I have to explain it. Seriously people get with the program. I give you comedic gold and I get nothing. How about this, now that you get my status go "like" it or comment on it. This will serve 2 purposes, I will know who reads my blog and it will make me feel popular. This is somewhat completely off subject, but why is Indiana Jones scared of snakes? They are natures belt. Not to be confused with the equator, which is earth's belt. Sorry Indiana Jones is on tv and I am getting distracted. On that note I will bid you all farewell. Stay tuned, next time I will be live from Denver, the city that almost looks like the word Beaver...but not really.
Au revoir
Isn't it weird how if you wake up 5 minutes earlier than normal you are like 30 minutes early for work or school? Seriously, When I am in the middle of a semester I will wake up with my alarm clock and get ready with the same routine every day, but I will get to school literally right before it starts, or a little after. If I get up 5 minutes earlier I am 30 minutes early for school. How is this possible? I was talking to a friend about this last week, and he said the same thing happens to him. So I know I am not alone on this. If you haven't tried this I suggest you do. It is miraculous. It is like there is a void in time in that 5 minutes before you normally wake up. It is my belief that the key to time manipulation lies in that 5 minutes. There is some sort of supernatural phenomenon in that small window of time that needs to be scientifically studied. Oddly enough, I didn't get on here to talk about that either.
I saw Captain America twice this weekend, once in 2D and then in 3D. For those of you who haven't seen it, I strongly suggest that you do. Not only is it awesome, it is awesome! There is a preview for The Amazing Spiderman and that promises to be a good movie. I did like the other spiderman movies but they were a little corny for my taste. And the new one looks like it will be following the way the comics were. One of the amazing things about Captain America was the way they were able to make Chris Evans look like a shrimp. The first 20 minutes or more of the movie he is scrawny and short. I was reading up on how they did that, and based on what I read they actually filmed him normally and shrunk him down in the post production. Originally, what I thought they did was have a small guy and put Chris Evan's face on him, but I was wrong. It is incredible how good it looked though. They did a really good job with that in this movie. I would have liked to see a little more of Captain America kicking butt, but I was definitely ok with the amount they had. Honestly, I don't think I could have been fully satisfied by any amount of action they could have had in this movie. I would have just wanted more. One thing I didn't like was that the love story isn't resolved, but there aren't many movies like that and I think that they will take care of that in The Avengers...hopefully. Besides that I loved the movie.
One thing I still cannot understand is people that leave before the credits are over in a movie like that. Are you kidding me? That is like reading a book and putting it down before reading the last page where it wraps everything up. That is actually a bad analogy for me because I don't read books, but still. It is common knowledge that movies like this have stuff after the credits. If you don't know that then you shouldn't be allowed in public because obviously you are an idiot. Oh, I thought of another analogy, it's like eating a candy bar and throwing away the last bite...who does that? What I am trying to say is that if you are gonna see Captain America stay through the credits because there is something that you will want to see at the end.
So obviously people on facebook don't appreciate pure gold when it comes to humor. My facebook status for 3 days has been "So wait...is xXx gonna be in The Avengers?" Obviously, no one gets it because I have no comments or likes on my status. Samuel L. Jackson plays Nick Fury in the recent Marvel movies. He also plays the guy that recruits Vin Diesel in xXx. Do you get it now? It's not funny now that I have to explain it. Seriously people get with the program. I give you comedic gold and I get nothing. How about this, now that you get my status go "like" it or comment on it. This will serve 2 purposes, I will know who reads my blog and it will make me feel popular. This is somewhat completely off subject, but why is Indiana Jones scared of snakes? They are natures belt. Not to be confused with the equator, which is earth's belt. Sorry Indiana Jones is on tv and I am getting distracted. On that note I will bid you all farewell. Stay tuned, next time I will be live from Denver, the city that almost looks like the word Beaver...but not really.
Au revoir
Monday, July 11, 2011
google+gum=immigration
I have been writing a lot lately...just an observation. I know my last blog was about facebook, but I feel it is important to address something that has just recently come to my attention. Have you heard of google+? For my sake I hope not. I haven't actually tried it yet, but from what I am hearing it is a new social network that could have the potential of taking over facebook. Here is why I am against it. Facebook is the norm now, everyone has gotten use to the fact that it is the social network to use. If we let this change then we are gonna have to start all over again. Everyone starts with their friends at 0 and you have to rebuild that network of people. Some of these people took 5 or 6 years to get a facebook. If google+ starts taking over these people, based on the math, probably won't get a google+ acount until 2020. It is an exponential thing, after google+ gets old these people will die before they ever get to the thing after google+. I say we let google keep the money they have, and reject them getting any more by not joining. I don't understand why google doesn't just combine with facebook. Obviously, google wants to be the most powerful thing on the web, but they should just calm down a little bit and let other people do things. If they combine with facebook it would be like Luke joining Darth Vader. They would rule the internet galaxy as google and son. I am not saying that facebook is the son of google...it just fit. But, who knows maybe the guy who invented google is the real father of Mark Zuckerberg. I am also not saying that google is like the dark side. Although, I do feel that google is the Wal-Mart of the web, except without the trailer trash and horrible smells.
I have heard that google+ offers the cleanliness that facebook did originally, that is nice, but how long until it is just as cluttered as facebook is now, or myspace was when everyone stopped using it. I know for certain that people are never satisfied. If google+ takes over it is just a matter of time before everyone gets sick of them. My point being, just stay on facebook. Find a way to write them about what you don't like about facebook, and if enough people write them about that problem I am sure they will change it. If they don't change it they are stupid and they deserve to be taken over. I personally do not think that the facebook team is stupid, they are quite smart. Also, I don't really want to lose the stability I have with facebook just because a greedy company is smart enough to do things that facebook isn't doing right now. Give facebook some time, they are working on some pretty cool stuff. I am certain when they are done they will start changing things to make it better...hopefully.
I mentioned Wal-Mart earlier. I had an experience there that I told myself I was going to talk about, but silly me I forgot until I was reminded of it. I went to Wal-Mart with some people and we got some of those fruit smoothie things that are in the back of the store in the juice fridge isle thingy. By the way this isn't the important part of the story I am just prefacing the events that happened right after this. So we checked out and walked out the automatic doors then WHAM! I stepped in a piece of gum. I hate people that are that lazy. It was literally 2 feet from a trash can. Gum chewers are much like cigarette smokers when it comes to littering. The difference is that when I step on gum in 100+ degree weather it sticks all up in the grooves of my shoes. I really wish that I had magical powers, or that I could curse people. I would make it so people get exactly what they deserve. In this case I would make it so that all the gum chewers that spit out their gum all over the sidewalk and in the street would step in gum every step they took for the next month. I would hope that after that they would learn their lesson. Unfortunately, some people think that if something happens to them they need to get even with the rest of the world. So they do whatever it was that was done to them they do back to everyone else. School is where this happens the most. I don't know how many times a teacher has told me "we had to suffer through this in school, and now so do you." Wow you are a great educator. How did you get this job, by beating your children mercilessly because you got the belt as a child? It surprises me how few educators are actually trying to make things better for the students. Most of them are just bitter angry people that somehow got into college and couldn't really perform in the area that they were studying so they decided to teach, and because of tenure they continue to ruin students for the rest of their career. If there is one thing that I have learned from 5 years of college it is that the education system doesn't teach students how to think for themselves and learn. It teaches them how to memorize a bunch of crap and forget it really fast. After 4-8 years of doing this the student leaves passionless, and with their teachers opinions and ideals burned into their minds. And the trend will just continue until we get a white president that makes education better. Having a black one hasn't really done anything. Maybe now that we have had a black president that was just as crappy as all the ones before him, people will realize we need to start voting for a president that will change things for the better. Instead of someone that will make them feel that americans aren't racist. But we all know that we are. The only reason a black man became president is because the electoral college finally outnumbered white people with black people during the election. I feel that if we are gonna have a black man as president it should be Michael Clarke Duncan. I would do anything that man told me to, and so would every country. If you don't know who that is, look him up and you will agree. There is no way a hispanic man is getting into office. There would be no end to immigration if that happened. The white house would have no vacant rooms because all his "family" would be living there, and no actual american could understand him when he addressed the country. Anyway, that's all I have to say. Seriously, if someone wants me to talk about something let me know. I would love to address any questions that people have.
Later
I have heard that google+ offers the cleanliness that facebook did originally, that is nice, but how long until it is just as cluttered as facebook is now, or myspace was when everyone stopped using it. I know for certain that people are never satisfied. If google+ takes over it is just a matter of time before everyone gets sick of them. My point being, just stay on facebook. Find a way to write them about what you don't like about facebook, and if enough people write them about that problem I am sure they will change it. If they don't change it they are stupid and they deserve to be taken over. I personally do not think that the facebook team is stupid, they are quite smart. Also, I don't really want to lose the stability I have with facebook just because a greedy company is smart enough to do things that facebook isn't doing right now. Give facebook some time, they are working on some pretty cool stuff. I am certain when they are done they will start changing things to make it better...hopefully.
I mentioned Wal-Mart earlier. I had an experience there that I told myself I was going to talk about, but silly me I forgot until I was reminded of it. I went to Wal-Mart with some people and we got some of those fruit smoothie things that are in the back of the store in the juice fridge isle thingy. By the way this isn't the important part of the story I am just prefacing the events that happened right after this. So we checked out and walked out the automatic doors then WHAM! I stepped in a piece of gum. I hate people that are that lazy. It was literally 2 feet from a trash can. Gum chewers are much like cigarette smokers when it comes to littering. The difference is that when I step on gum in 100+ degree weather it sticks all up in the grooves of my shoes. I really wish that I had magical powers, or that I could curse people. I would make it so people get exactly what they deserve. In this case I would make it so that all the gum chewers that spit out their gum all over the sidewalk and in the street would step in gum every step they took for the next month. I would hope that after that they would learn their lesson. Unfortunately, some people think that if something happens to them they need to get even with the rest of the world. So they do whatever it was that was done to them they do back to everyone else. School is where this happens the most. I don't know how many times a teacher has told me "we had to suffer through this in school, and now so do you." Wow you are a great educator. How did you get this job, by beating your children mercilessly because you got the belt as a child? It surprises me how few educators are actually trying to make things better for the students. Most of them are just bitter angry people that somehow got into college and couldn't really perform in the area that they were studying so they decided to teach, and because of tenure they continue to ruin students for the rest of their career. If there is one thing that I have learned from 5 years of college it is that the education system doesn't teach students how to think for themselves and learn. It teaches them how to memorize a bunch of crap and forget it really fast. After 4-8 years of doing this the student leaves passionless, and with their teachers opinions and ideals burned into their minds. And the trend will just continue until we get a white president that makes education better. Having a black one hasn't really done anything. Maybe now that we have had a black president that was just as crappy as all the ones before him, people will realize we need to start voting for a president that will change things for the better. Instead of someone that will make them feel that americans aren't racist. But we all know that we are. The only reason a black man became president is because the electoral college finally outnumbered white people with black people during the election. I feel that if we are gonna have a black man as president it should be Michael Clarke Duncan. I would do anything that man told me to, and so would every country. If you don't know who that is, look him up and you will agree. There is no way a hispanic man is getting into office. There would be no end to immigration if that happened. The white house would have no vacant rooms because all his "family" would be living there, and no actual american could understand him when he addressed the country. Anyway, that's all I have to say. Seriously, if someone wants me to talk about something let me know. I would love to address any questions that people have.
Later
Friday, July 8, 2011
Planking, Smoking, and Gaying
Ok here is the deal. At first I thought it was just one person's inside joke so I was ok with it. Then I saw more and more people doing it. So I googled it, and I found out that not only is it not just an inside joke, it has a facebook page with 472,555 likes. What is this phenomenon you ask. It is planking. Wikipedia defines planking as:
"The lying down game (also known as planking, or face downs) is an activity, popular in various parts of the world, consisting of lying face down in an unusual or incongruous location. The hands must touch the sides of the body, and having a photograph of the participant taken and posted on the Internet is an integral part of the game. Players compete to find the most unusual and original location in which to play. The location should also be as public as possible, and as many people as possible should be involved."
Does anyone else find this as stupid as I do? My question is how can something this lame be such a hype? It seems like everyone is doing it too. Friends on facebook that I thought were sane and logical people are laying down and taking these ridiculous pictures of themselves lying down on random crap. I think I am gonna start a new picture taking craze called standing. What you do is you stand some where and someone takes a picture of you. The rules are that you have to have your hands awkwardly placed inside your pants, your feet have to be out to the side like a ballerina, and you have to try to bite your ear. The more weirded out and disturbed people that you capture in the picture the better your picture is. I expect to see at least 100 photos of this on facebook by next weekend. Seriously though, who makes this crap up? Maybe a guy suffering from catatonic rigidity and narcolepsy was on a boat and nearly fell overboard, but got stuck on the edge of the boat. Then some guy took a picture of him, and said "dude, that guy was totally like a plank." That is just my theory of how something like this could have manifested. I am not sure. All I know is that I personally think it is a very stupid thing, and that gigs, maybe even terabytes, of space are being wasted with these pictures. If I had children and they were involved in this planking crap I would disown them, and if they continued on with their idiotic ways I would kill them. I will not have my name be ruined. If I had kids that stupid it would be my responsibility to get rid of them. That is the problem with the world today. Sickness isn't getting rid of the idiots fast enough and parents aren't doing their part in getting rid of the stupid ones either. Back in the day, the stupid and sickly children would have died at young ages, but now they live and pollute the world with their stupidity because of medical advancements. I will be the first to admit that I am one of those idiots polluting the world, but fortunately I don't pollute it with pictures of me laying down on stupid stuff.
I am now going to talk about another form of pollution. I can't believe it has taken me so long to blog about this one. I would never gamble. Why you ask? I will tell you. I can't stand the smell of cigarette smoke, or any kind of smoke for that matter. Campfire smoke is the most tolerable, but even then it is quite annoying. If you are a smoker and you get offended easily I suggest you stop reading now, because I don't have many nice things to say about you. I am sure that there are polite and humane smokers out there, but you make about .0001% of the smoker population. The rest of you are all jerks and I hope that the next cigarette you smoke kills you. I have a question first, as I usually do, how is smoking enticing? How exactly did you get into that whole life style of pissing off regular air breathers such as myself? Did you think to yourself "hmm, I am sick of breathing normal air. I think I am gonna go breath some smoke." Obviously, they sold them back in the day as a way to calm you down, but there is so much anti-smoking stuff out now that only an idiot would start. Yet, they still continue to smoke. So here it is, why I can't stand smokers.
There is a law in Utah that proves to be apparently pointless. Yet, there are signs everywhere about it. It is the sign that you are smoking next to, I believe it says "NO SMOKING WITHIN 25 FEET OF BUILDING." It is possible that with your smoke blowing all over the place you might be reading it as "SMOKE RIGHT NEXT TO THE BUILDING AND MAKING SURE THAT YOU BLOW SMOKE RIGHT AT THE GROUPS OF PEOPLE WALKING INTO THIS BUILDING." Unfortunately, you are reading it wrong. It is possible that smokers are uneducated and can't read. I would believe this since it was in elementary that they taught us not to smoke. Either way it is rude, and I would appreciate it if you would obey the law. Another thing that bothers me about smokers is how much they litter. I use to work at a gas station, and I had to clean up hundreds of cigarette butts every night when I swept the parking lot. A job that could have taken 3 minutes turned into a 10+ minute job because smokers didn't put their cigarette butts in a freaking ash tray. I don't get serious about very many things, but smokers anger me beyond belief. ARRGGG!
New subject...gays. I personally don't have a problem with them, I don't think what they are doing is right. But I will just let natural selection have its way with them. I do have an opinion about them though. I believe that a lot of gay people are being gay just because they want to be accepted. I am certain that there are actual gay people, but I am also certain that there are just a lot of people that want to belong and feel like they are a part of something. Here is how I know. I saw a gay guy the other day, and for quite some time I was trying to figure out if it was a guy or a girl. It took me at least 2 minutes of staring to finally figure it out. So, I started to think a little bit. It doesn't make sense that a gay guy would be attracted to another guy that looks like a girl. It also doesn't make sense that a gay woman would be attracted to a girl that looks like a guy. Are you following? Here is where I believe the distinction between real gay people and pretend gay people lies. If a gay guy is attracted to a guy that looks like a woman it would seem that he is straight would it not? The only difference between this guy and your average guy is the second that a normal guy finds out its a guy, he looks away and throws up a little in his mouth because he realizes he was just checking out a guy. I hope I am making a clear point here, it only makes sense to me that this is the case. I personally don't understand how a woman could be attracted to guy, they are slobby, lazy, stupid, and lazy. I mean, I enjoy being friends with other guys because we all share the stupid gene together so we get along, but men being attracted to other men? I mean there is something wrong there. I am sorry for those people. Women on the other hand are praised for their beauty, it makes sense to me that women would be attracted to other women just because women are actually attractive. This doesn't mean that I think that it is right in any way, I just understand how it could happen. Anyway, what I am getting at is that a guy attracted to a guy that looks like a girl just doesn't make any sense, just go after a girl. They are more attractive and they make you food.
By the way, I would never kill one of my children. I was joking around. Just in case you were wondering.
"The lying down game (also known as planking, or face downs) is an activity, popular in various parts of the world, consisting of lying face down in an unusual or incongruous location. The hands must touch the sides of the body, and having a photograph of the participant taken and posted on the Internet is an integral part of the game. Players compete to find the most unusual and original location in which to play. The location should also be as public as possible, and as many people as possible should be involved."
Does anyone else find this as stupid as I do? My question is how can something this lame be such a hype? It seems like everyone is doing it too. Friends on facebook that I thought were sane and logical people are laying down and taking these ridiculous pictures of themselves lying down on random crap. I think I am gonna start a new picture taking craze called standing. What you do is you stand some where and someone takes a picture of you. The rules are that you have to have your hands awkwardly placed inside your pants, your feet have to be out to the side like a ballerina, and you have to try to bite your ear. The more weirded out and disturbed people that you capture in the picture the better your picture is. I expect to see at least 100 photos of this on facebook by next weekend. Seriously though, who makes this crap up? Maybe a guy suffering from catatonic rigidity and narcolepsy was on a boat and nearly fell overboard, but got stuck on the edge of the boat. Then some guy took a picture of him, and said "dude, that guy was totally like a plank." That is just my theory of how something like this could have manifested. I am not sure. All I know is that I personally think it is a very stupid thing, and that gigs, maybe even terabytes, of space are being wasted with these pictures. If I had children and they were involved in this planking crap I would disown them, and if they continued on with their idiotic ways I would kill them. I will not have my name be ruined. If I had kids that stupid it would be my responsibility to get rid of them. That is the problem with the world today. Sickness isn't getting rid of the idiots fast enough and parents aren't doing their part in getting rid of the stupid ones either. Back in the day, the stupid and sickly children would have died at young ages, but now they live and pollute the world with their stupidity because of medical advancements. I will be the first to admit that I am one of those idiots polluting the world, but fortunately I don't pollute it with pictures of me laying down on stupid stuff.
I am now going to talk about another form of pollution. I can't believe it has taken me so long to blog about this one. I would never gamble. Why you ask? I will tell you. I can't stand the smell of cigarette smoke, or any kind of smoke for that matter. Campfire smoke is the most tolerable, but even then it is quite annoying. If you are a smoker and you get offended easily I suggest you stop reading now, because I don't have many nice things to say about you. I am sure that there are polite and humane smokers out there, but you make about .0001% of the smoker population. The rest of you are all jerks and I hope that the next cigarette you smoke kills you. I have a question first, as I usually do, how is smoking enticing? How exactly did you get into that whole life style of pissing off regular air breathers such as myself? Did you think to yourself "hmm, I am sick of breathing normal air. I think I am gonna go breath some smoke." Obviously, they sold them back in the day as a way to calm you down, but there is so much anti-smoking stuff out now that only an idiot would start. Yet, they still continue to smoke. So here it is, why I can't stand smokers.
There is a law in Utah that proves to be apparently pointless. Yet, there are signs everywhere about it. It is the sign that you are smoking next to, I believe it says "NO SMOKING WITHIN 25 FEET OF BUILDING." It is possible that with your smoke blowing all over the place you might be reading it as "SMOKE RIGHT NEXT TO THE BUILDING AND MAKING SURE THAT YOU BLOW SMOKE RIGHT AT THE GROUPS OF PEOPLE WALKING INTO THIS BUILDING." Unfortunately, you are reading it wrong. It is possible that smokers are uneducated and can't read. I would believe this since it was in elementary that they taught us not to smoke. Either way it is rude, and I would appreciate it if you would obey the law. Another thing that bothers me about smokers is how much they litter. I use to work at a gas station, and I had to clean up hundreds of cigarette butts every night when I swept the parking lot. A job that could have taken 3 minutes turned into a 10+ minute job because smokers didn't put their cigarette butts in a freaking ash tray. I don't get serious about very many things, but smokers anger me beyond belief. ARRGGG!
New subject...gays. I personally don't have a problem with them, I don't think what they are doing is right. But I will just let natural selection have its way with them. I do have an opinion about them though. I believe that a lot of gay people are being gay just because they want to be accepted. I am certain that there are actual gay people, but I am also certain that there are just a lot of people that want to belong and feel like they are a part of something. Here is how I know. I saw a gay guy the other day, and for quite some time I was trying to figure out if it was a guy or a girl. It took me at least 2 minutes of staring to finally figure it out. So, I started to think a little bit. It doesn't make sense that a gay guy would be attracted to another guy that looks like a girl. It also doesn't make sense that a gay woman would be attracted to a girl that looks like a guy. Are you following? Here is where I believe the distinction between real gay people and pretend gay people lies. If a gay guy is attracted to a guy that looks like a woman it would seem that he is straight would it not? The only difference between this guy and your average guy is the second that a normal guy finds out its a guy, he looks away and throws up a little in his mouth because he realizes he was just checking out a guy. I hope I am making a clear point here, it only makes sense to me that this is the case. I personally don't understand how a woman could be attracted to guy, they are slobby, lazy, stupid, and lazy. I mean, I enjoy being friends with other guys because we all share the stupid gene together so we get along, but men being attracted to other men? I mean there is something wrong there. I am sorry for those people. Women on the other hand are praised for their beauty, it makes sense to me that women would be attracted to other women just because women are actually attractive. This doesn't mean that I think that it is right in any way, I just understand how it could happen. Anyway, what I am getting at is that a guy attracted to a guy that looks like a girl just doesn't make any sense, just go after a girl. They are more attractive and they make you food.
By the way, I would never kill one of my children. I was joking around. Just in case you were wondering.
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Facebook is charging!!
Dear friends,
I am surprised at some peoples stupidity...wait let me back up a little bit. I should address one thing before I make fun of people. Happy 4th of July yesterday. Nothing says I love my country like a bunch of fireworks. That, beer, and bad decisions. I spent my 4th of July with friends, and we had a small party/BBQ, it was quite entertaining. Anyway enough about me. I have come to discuss some things that I feel are important to discuss, trust me I wouldn't waste my time writing about things that I don't feel are important. A long time ago on a website far far away. There was a guy named Tom. Tom was a creator of a website that, for a while, was taking over social networking as we knew it. During this time people repeatedly kept sending me messages that Myspace was going to start charging for profiles unless you went into a dark cave and got a dragon egg and sent it to Tom at the Myspace offices...or something like that. Anyway, it was obvious to me that this was a scam, but unfortunately a lot of people seem to lack the intelligence to see through these types of things. It was also around this time that I found out that I can't really trust anything that anyone says, because chances are they are full of a four letter word, this can be any word of your choosing for these purposes. Anyway, Tom sent messages to everyone on Myspace assuring that there was no way that he was going to charge people for Hisspace, haha that's funny, but people kept sending me those same chain messages. Why do I bring this up you ask? Well I will tell you. Yesterday, or a couple of days ago...it's not really important, I saw someone post on their wall that facebook is going to start charging for profiles. Some times I wonder if people were made just for the sole purpose of annoying me. I am sorry if this is going to offend you, but honestly you deserve to be offended if you are this big of an idiot! First of all, if facebook was going to start charging you, wouldn't there be some kind of message when you logged in at the top of the screen that says "Hey, starting on this date we are gonna start charging." There wouldn't be a message cycling around through a bunch of random people about it telling you to do some ridiculous thing. Secondly, facebook is probably one of the richest companies in the world. Mark Zuckerberg is the youngest billionaire in history, there is no way that he would start charging for something that he is making that much money from. Thirdly, the money comes from advertising and investors. Have you noticed that when you download an app there are sometimes 2 options, you can buy it for $.99 or you can get the free version with the annoying ads in it. Either way they are making money. Same basic concept. I think I have vented enough about that, if you still don't understand this concept I have a shovel and a very large garden in the back yard in which I will bury you. The world could deal with less morons, and I would be proud to do my part in getting rid of some of them.
Speaking of facebook, what is the deal with people that don't have a profile? Get off your high horse and join the rest of the world. It is really difficult to facebook stalk you if you don't have a facebook. Oh, and if you think it is creepy that people facebook stalk, you should watch the movie The Social Network, because that is pretty much what facebook was made for. Although, that is not only what facebook is used for now. You can have your profile settings so that no one can see your profile, that is fine with me...I can stalk you in real life, but I need to know you exist, and the only way I can do that is if you have a facebook. To be blunt, you are pretty much dead to me and to the rest of the world if you don't have a facebook profile. That is how everything is done now. Party invites, wedding invites, more party invites, what people are doing, where they are, party invites. Are you getting the picture? You are literally socially dead if you don't have a facebook. Even if you have one and you don't check it, it still gives the illusion that you are on there, but no one will even think of you if you aren't, and you will most likely die alone with a bunch of cats...that probably have a facebook page. Don't give the excuse that you are gonna waste a bunch of time on it, that is your fault, learn to control yourself if you have time issues. I am not talking about old people here, old people can die, they don't need facebooks. I think there should be an age restriction on facebook honestly, I don't want my grandma looking at everything I am doing. Actually, I wouldn't be worried about that, everyone over 45 in my family doesn't even know how to open a web browser, not to mention figure out how facebook works. My point is that facebook is how you are social now, if you are a social person, you need a facebook. Either for the betterment of yourself or for everyone else. Don't be selfish, don't make excuses, don't be old and technologically in-advanced. Get a facebook.
This has been a message from
THE FOUNDATION FOR A BETTER LIFE®
I am surprised at some peoples stupidity...wait let me back up a little bit. I should address one thing before I make fun of people. Happy 4th of July yesterday. Nothing says I love my country like a bunch of fireworks. That, beer, and bad decisions. I spent my 4th of July with friends, and we had a small party/BBQ, it was quite entertaining. Anyway enough about me. I have come to discuss some things that I feel are important to discuss, trust me I wouldn't waste my time writing about things that I don't feel are important. A long time ago on a website far far away. There was a guy named Tom. Tom was a creator of a website that, for a while, was taking over social networking as we knew it. During this time people repeatedly kept sending me messages that Myspace was going to start charging for profiles unless you went into a dark cave and got a dragon egg and sent it to Tom at the Myspace offices...or something like that. Anyway, it was obvious to me that this was a scam, but unfortunately a lot of people seem to lack the intelligence to see through these types of things. It was also around this time that I found out that I can't really trust anything that anyone says, because chances are they are full of a four letter word, this can be any word of your choosing for these purposes. Anyway, Tom sent messages to everyone on Myspace assuring that there was no way that he was going to charge people for Hisspace, haha that's funny, but people kept sending me those same chain messages. Why do I bring this up you ask? Well I will tell you. Yesterday, or a couple of days ago...it's not really important, I saw someone post on their wall that facebook is going to start charging for profiles. Some times I wonder if people were made just for the sole purpose of annoying me. I am sorry if this is going to offend you, but honestly you deserve to be offended if you are this big of an idiot! First of all, if facebook was going to start charging you, wouldn't there be some kind of message when you logged in at the top of the screen that says "Hey, starting on this date we are gonna start charging." There wouldn't be a message cycling around through a bunch of random people about it telling you to do some ridiculous thing. Secondly, facebook is probably one of the richest companies in the world. Mark Zuckerberg is the youngest billionaire in history, there is no way that he would start charging for something that he is making that much money from. Thirdly, the money comes from advertising and investors. Have you noticed that when you download an app there are sometimes 2 options, you can buy it for $.99 or you can get the free version with the annoying ads in it. Either way they are making money. Same basic concept. I think I have vented enough about that, if you still don't understand this concept I have a shovel and a very large garden in the back yard in which I will bury you. The world could deal with less morons, and I would be proud to do my part in getting rid of some of them.
Speaking of facebook, what is the deal with people that don't have a profile? Get off your high horse and join the rest of the world. It is really difficult to facebook stalk you if you don't have a facebook. Oh, and if you think it is creepy that people facebook stalk, you should watch the movie The Social Network, because that is pretty much what facebook was made for. Although, that is not only what facebook is used for now. You can have your profile settings so that no one can see your profile, that is fine with me...I can stalk you in real life, but I need to know you exist, and the only way I can do that is if you have a facebook. To be blunt, you are pretty much dead to me and to the rest of the world if you don't have a facebook profile. That is how everything is done now. Party invites, wedding invites, more party invites, what people are doing, where they are, party invites. Are you getting the picture? You are literally socially dead if you don't have a facebook. Even if you have one and you don't check it, it still gives the illusion that you are on there, but no one will even think of you if you aren't, and you will most likely die alone with a bunch of cats...that probably have a facebook page. Don't give the excuse that you are gonna waste a bunch of time on it, that is your fault, learn to control yourself if you have time issues. I am not talking about old people here, old people can die, they don't need facebooks. I think there should be an age restriction on facebook honestly, I don't want my grandma looking at everything I am doing. Actually, I wouldn't be worried about that, everyone over 45 in my family doesn't even know how to open a web browser, not to mention figure out how facebook works. My point is that facebook is how you are social now, if you are a social person, you need a facebook. Either for the betterment of yourself or for everyone else. Don't be selfish, don't make excuses, don't be old and technologically in-advanced. Get a facebook.
This has been a message from
THE FOUNDATION FOR A BETTER LIFE®
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