Girls, being checked out is flattering. Trust me.

It seems I am in the blogging spirit today. It might be helping that I realized last night after checking out my blog stats that I have had almost 1600 page views on my blog. I decided it is time to monetize. mon·e·tize/ˈmänəˌtīz/ Verb: Convert into or express in the form of currency. Basically what I am saying is that I think I can make some money off of my blog, and money is good. Google will put some ads in my blog, and if people click those ads I make money for each click. How much money you ask? I don't know, but what I do know is that I will make some amount of money. Anyway, that isn't what I got on here to talk about. I mean yeah, that is some of the reason. The more blog posts I make the more page views I will get, and the more money I will get from google. Anyway, the main reason I decided to blog is because of a status update that I just put on facebook. I said, "Hey girls, if you want guys to stop checking you out so much, maybe you should consider being less attractive. Otherwise we are going to continue to do what we do best (checking you out). While you do what you do best (be attractive). Capisce?" I started to think about what I said, and I realized that not only should girls not get offended that guys are checking them out. They should realize that it is a compliment. It is our way of saying, "Hey, I think you are an attractive individual." I know a lot of women think that guys are thinking dirty thoughts when we check them out, or that we are picturing them naked or something like that. Let me put that myth to rest. For me, at least, I have a really bad imagination. If I tried to picture a girl naked in my head I would most likely end up with a mental image of a fat old guy in a pink tutu, or I would get distracted during my thought process and start thinking about something else. When I am looking at a girl I am just soaking in her beauty, and enjoying how the room has been lit up since she walked in. And women, don't even pretend you don't check out guys. You think you can get offended about guys checking you out, but you can check out guys all you want? I don't think so. The messed up thing is that when a girl checks out a guy he welcomes it. The guys that really get pissed are the unattractive ones. The term douchebag was likely created by a guy who was jealous of another guy that was getting a ton of female attention. So the jealous guy started calling him the most gross feminine thing he could think of. Probably a true story. We don't necessarily mean it in that gross of a way any more when we call a guy that. It just became a name that you can use to describe a really built guy who gets a lot of female attention, and treats women like objects. Back to my main point though. Girls you should be flattered when a guy checks you out. Maybe walk past him so he can get a better look, and make sure that you actually are attractive. Let's be honest guys there have been times we have been checking a girl out from far away, and when she gets closer you realize you have actually been checking out a guy with long hair. It is really difficult to tell the difference from that far away. Especially if the guy has a shapely figure. I think my favorite thing about when a girl walks past me is when I smell her perfume. Girls can literally render a man completely dumb by wearing a really nice smelling perfume, and then walking past him. I am sure that I have had multiple heart murmurs from such a situation. It is pretty intense.

So ladies, to sum up. Make sure that you properly thank a guy that is checking you out by being flattered, then walking past him, making sure that you have great perfume on, and if you feel really brave give him a wink. The likely hood that he is dead, and or having a heart attack from that experience is pretty high. So you get two things for the price of one. The first thing you get is a compliment since the guy checked you out, and the second thing you get is that the guy is probably dead. So you don't have to worry about some strange guy asking for your number, and stalking you. Unless of course he is a douchebag in which case they are completely immune to girls smelling nice, and walking past them. So all you can really do in that situation is make sure that you have a wooden stake to drive through his heart, or a silver bullet to blow his freaking head off. Because it is likely that he is either a werewolf, or a sparkling vampire, and if movies have told us anything it is that those two creatures cannot be trusted with a woman. Because A. They will impregnate them, and B. They will try to hook up with your rapidly aging baby girl. Yes, I did just reference a movie that I have never seen before, and yes I am about 50% sure that I got some kind of detail wrong about that reference. Do I care? Not really.

Jake out.

Reasons That I Have Grown Tired of Living

I am going to be very up front about this. This is in no way a suicidal blog, or a way for me to get people to feel sorry for me. That is not what I want at all. This is just an outlet for the way I feel. I don't want comments about people feeling sorry for me, or people feeling guilty because they think they are part of the reason that I am writing this post. I am just writing because I can, and this is currently what I am thinking about. Hence the name of my blog. So now that I have done my disclaimer statement here we go.

Reasons that I have grown tired of living:

School-

I can't even tell you how sick of school I am. I have been in school for going on six years, and I haven't even gotten a bachelors degree yet. Hopefully, by the end of summer semester I will have one finally, but even then it isn't a guarantee. I have to hope that my professors will be fair, and not throw in stupid assignments or grade really hard. I also have to hope that I can finish all of my assignments by the time they are due. This is difficult because I know that half of the assignments are total bull crap. They don't apply to me at all. When did school become "do all of this work because I said so" instead of "learn all of this stuff because you need to?" I don't really care when it became like that. I just care that I have to deal with it. I want to learn things that I want to learn. I do not enjoy, and I can barely tolerate things that I don't enjoy doing.

I hate working-

This is a huge problem. I really don't like to work. I enjoy doing things that are enjoyable. I believe that life is about learning and working for things, but I don't personally believe in working for things that I have no passion for. I mentally cannot work for very long on something that means absolutely nothing to me. That is just how I am. I can't work dead end jobs, and I can't work jobs for people that think they know everything, or that won't fix problems with the work situation. If I can't land a job that suits me well. Then I won't be living in the first place. So what is the point of being alive in that situation?

I can't trust people-

I have somewhat touched on this subject before, but I think I will go into a little more detail. You can barely trust anyone, and even the people you completely trust you can't always count on. They have lives, and sometimes their lives don't always have room for you. Then there are the people that you can't trust, which for me is pretty much 99.999999999999% of the worlds population. People are selfish, they lie, and they just can't be trusted. I can't even trust myself. Things that I get mad at other people for I am guilty of. Unfortunately for me, not everyone can see that in themselves. So there are the select few of us that see all of our faults all of the time, and it drives me completely freaking nuts. I am sure that there are faults of mine that I still have picked up on, and even that drives me crazy. I think that I can count on myself to be consistent, but I can't. People say that you can't control anyone but yourself. I disagree with that statement, because I can't even control myself half of the time. I try, but I always fall up short. Anyway back to other people. They can be evil, manipulative, and in some cases they just want to hurt you because that makes them feel better. The sad thing is that I bet most of them don't even realize that they are that way. They live life being completely unaware of their actions. Ignorance really is bliss, and I seem to be living a life completely empty of bliss.

The world is a screwed up place-

This is pretty self explanatory. There are wars, corrupt leaders, toppling economies, natural disasters, and countless other problems. I am personally sick of it all. I just want to live in peace. That has been my life's entire goal, but it seems that I am almost completely alone in that endeavor. Most people seem to enjoy causing mass chaos, and making everything over complicated to the point that can cause severe mental illness. I am just sick of the turmoil.

Debt-

I am not of fan of not having money. I am claustrophobic in 2 ways. With tight spaces, and tight situations. When life gets a little too crazy I literally have a hard time breathing, and the money situation is the worst. I think I might actually die of suffocation if I was completely poor. So I have come up with a few short term ways of having money. A $500 credit card, and school loans. Things of that nature. Things that when the time comes I will have to pay back, and if I don't have the funds when the time comes to pay it back I am pretty much screwed. I will have absolutely nothing if I can't pay them back. Sadly, school doesn't exactly seem like it is paying off the way that it should. Even if I can get a job, it will probably not pay enough and I will be working for a boss that is closely related to satan. How is that living exactly? I would rather not be alive in that situation.

Health issues-

It seems that life has handed me an interesting, and really crappy card when it comes to health. I am over weight (surprise to those who didn't know), and I have a pretty bad back whose vertebrae pinch on nerves that, when I have been walking around for too long, eventually make my legs go to sleep. These are among other health issues that I can't completely recall for whatever reason. Needless to say it really sucks. I kind of wonder if the only thing in my body that even works somewhat is my brain. I would have much rather been an in shape person. Unfortunately, I have not the will power to do anything about my health situation, but we will get to the reason for that later. Another thing about health that is understandable, but still annoying, is hygiene. I gotta be honest showering, shaving, brushing my teeth, and whatever else is probably the biggest nuisance ever. Just incase you were wondering I do all of those things, but it doesn't mean that I enjoy it at all. In fact, I loathe every minute of it. I wish that I could put my body on auto pilot for those parts of the day, because it is just one more thing that I can't stand doing. Yet, I know that I will continue to do it because I hold on to the small possibility that I might one day get a girlfriend. But, more on that in a little bit.

Insects-

I hate them. In my ideal world there would only be me, and a bunch of attractive women, and a few of my best friends. Did you notice how there were no insects in my ideal world? That is because I do not like them at all. I can't even do anything without worrying if there is going to be some kind of insect like a spider or a roach that is gonna pop up out of nowhere and freak me the crap out. It almost feels like every insects entire life mission is to mess with me, or freak me out. I gotta be honest I am sick of every single one of those beady eyed little #@!%&#@s. I hate them all!

Lack of friends-

Lately, it seems like I hardly have any friends. It is a serious downer. All the friends I use to have either moved away, or got married. The friends that are still around have new friends now, and I am not a part of their group. It really isn't that easy to get back in with people that have their own new group of friends now. So every time I see these people it is just an awkward hello, and some small talk. This is all just pointless, because in the end they are gonna go hang out with their friends, and I am still gonna be sitting there by myself or with one of the 3 people I still hang out with. It is really depressing. Then I try to make new friends, but they just act like they don't want anything to do with me. I don't know if that is the message they are trying to send, or if they just don't have enough time for new friends, but either way it sucks. Really all anyone is really looking for is a significant other anyway. That is most likely why it is so difficult to make any new friends. Either they are in a relationship, or they just hang out exclusively with people that they would potentially date. I am in neither of those categories from what I have observed.

Women-

The sad thing is that none of the other stuff matters when it comes to women. They literally have all the power to determine whether or not I am tired of living. I have absolutely no drive being single. What I am I working towards? I have no one but myself to provide for. Honestly, I don't really care much for myself. I let my health stay at a crappy level, because I have no one to be healthy for. I can't stand school, because once I finish and get a job the only thing I will be providing for is myself. What is the point of that? I don't care if I trust people as long as I have one person that I can trust. My "other half" if you will. The world is a screwed up place, but it is worth trying to fix for someone else. Debt becomes something that you can over come if there is someone to overcome it with. Insects could be less scary if there was someone that I was killing them for. I would likely be able to stop focusing on my own faults if I had someone to focus my attention on. Do you see what I am saying? In my eyes the reason worth living is that there could be that one person that is essentially your soul mate. The person that allows you to stop focusing on yourself, and makes it possible to live instead of survive. I don't think that having another person in my life would make life at all any easier, but it would definitely make it worth it. I feel like my entire 24 years of living has been one enormous wait for the girl that will make me feel alive. I could be wrong about all of this, but this is just how I feel, and nothing has really happened to make me believe any different. Pretty much every second I live is only because I hope that maybe the next second I will meet the girl that will make every second leading up to and after it worth the wait. I'm not gonna lie. Most of the time I don't think it will ever happen, but I guess it is worth the gamble. Am I a hopeless romantic? Pretty much.

Disclaimer: Again I don't want any comments about people feeling sorry for me, or any crap like that. This is my outlet, and I am using it. Every time people make comments feeling sorry for me I am less likely to open up like this again. I also would like to add that my next post will more than likely resemble past posts I have made regarding humor. It is not often I post something serious, but I really needed an outlet. I didn't want my brain to explode.