Once upon a time there was a mexican and a white kid. The white kid was me. They were friends and they hung out every once in a while. Well last night they went on an adventure to get Ben and Jerry's ice cream, because it is delicious. The first stop on their journey was Harmons, the grocer in your neighborhood. It was late and the main doors were closed, but because the white kid had entered at this late hour many times before, he knew that there was still a way in. The employee entrance wasn't very heavily guarded, unless you count a semi-overweight woman standing next to it. Fortunately, she was distracted by the cheese kiosk that she was drooling over. Needless to say we got in quite easily without being detected. We made our way to the ice cream isle as stealthily as 2 fat guys can. And there it was encased before our eyes, the ice cream we had been searching for. Unfortunately it was like $3.99, so they were like screw that and went to Wal-Mart.
As they pulled in to the lot of parking, the white kid realized something that annoyed him. You know how people just leave their shopping carts all over the place in parking lots? How lazy are those people? They put the shopping cart things like every 20 feet in the parking lot. I am super lazy, but I still take the 2 seconds out of my day to return the cart to the appropriate place. Some times I even feel generous and take it all the way back in, because supposedly one person can help change the world. I think that's crap. Even if a person has a great idea, they cannot do the entire world changing process by themselves. I guess it did start with that one person though. Ok, never mind I believe it now. Anyway, it is really easy to take the cart back, I usually make a game out of it. When I was a kid I would pretend the shopping cart was a scooter and then when I got to the cart rack, I would push it in as fast as I could. I still do that to this day. Maybe what everyones problem is, is that they have no imagination. Their parents were so strict that they ruined their ability not only to imagine, but to be a considerate member of society. So, the white kid and the mexican made their way into Wal-Mart. As they entered the white kid found yet another thing that he wanted to write about the next day. Aren't Wal-Mart greeters awkward? The answer is yes if you are wondering. Usually they are fat old people that have no social skills. So they say "welcome to Wal-Mart" almost inaudibly. Then you feel obligated to say thank you to them. Honestly, they just need to get rid of them. It will make everyones visit a little better. Either that or they should get incredibly attractive women to greet people. If they did that it would probably increase their sales. It is a known fact that attractive women are the best sales people. They just have to flirt a little bit, and then every nerd that goes into the store is walking out with a $1500 flat screen t.v. and some other expensive thing. So, the two friends passed the awkward greeter. They again made their way to the ice cream of Ben and of Jerry. Then glowing in the isle, before their eyes was the ice cream. And it was only $3.25 freaking Harmons! So they bought it, and they also ventured to the land of Del Taco where they bought the $.49 burritos, which were worth the money they costed. They then returned to the home of the white kid, where they feasted on their spoils of food.
The End
I would just like to end with a thought. Does the word February make any sense? Is the silent R there just to confuse children and immigrants? Everyone pronounces it Febuary, so they should probably just change it. I could understand French people writing it like that, almost every word in French has at least 5 silent letters in it. But we are not French, so why is there an R in February? Just something to think about.
TTFN
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