So I Started An Online Dating Profile

Let me back up and give you some reasons that I did this. First of all there are always these commercials that claim that all these people have found their 'match' when they tried online dating. I am interested in finding my 'match' just as much as the next guy, but I am more of a believer in actually meeting people in real life, because, to be honest, if there was only a picture and some vague description of me, written by me of course, that is pretty sarcastic, because I wrote it, I doubt that there are very many scenarios where that would work to my advantage. The way I approach relationships, probably the worst way looking back on my track record, is by the age old admiring from afar. I flirt with girls, get to know them a little, hang out with them, become great friends with them, and if they never show interest then I just hold onto the hope that they will eventually find that they have liked me all along, but they never realized it. Well Jake, it is obvious that is a pretty stupid way to approach it, because it is likely that the girl doesn't even know you are interested, and you pretty much set yourself up to be in the friend zone. Well thank you. I realize that. Unfortunately, I lack the confidence to go any further, and the hope that she would one day like me overpowers, in my mind, the likelihood that she would be interested now. Anyway enough with my personal efforts to stay single my whole life. The biggest reason that I joined this online dating site was because I like to experience things and find out what they are like and how they work. I am somewhat of a social scientist without the title, degree, or knowledge. Basically, I am just a very curious person. I wanted to see what it was like, and, who knows, maybe find love (I doubt it) in the process. Here is what I have found:

Most of the girls that I have seen on there are, to put it nicely, sweet spirits. This is the biggest pit fall to online dating sites for me. I have said it before and I will say it again. I am pretty shallow. Nature made me that way. I would love to be attracted to women that aren't attractive to me. Do you know how easy that would be? Pretty easy I'd wager. Sure personality is a definite must, but I don't think that I could have a really strong love for someone that I am not physically attracted too. It is terrible I know. She doesn't have to be perfect, but she does have to be perfect for me.

The next most prominent group of women are single mothers who are now looking for a nice guy type after their terrible 1-2 year marriage to, most likely, and alcoholic pig douche jerk face prick. What I think is that they still hold on to the idea that they will find a guy who is, more or less, the same as the first guy except doesn't beat her and make her cry. The reason I believe this is because I have been interested in a few single moms in the past year (I even asked one out by writing her a song, an encrypted letter, and built her a website that the encrypted letter sent her too...This whole elaborate scheme and not one date.), and from what I can tell this is exactly how the majority of them are. The reality is that they will inevitably go in circles with guys that are practically the exact same as the first. Possibly even worse.

The 3rd biggest group of women are single and incredibly attractive. Girls like that pretty much have their choice of any guy they could want. My question is why are they on a dating website when they probably go on 2-3 dates every night with a wait list that is 5 miles long, and booked a year in advance. My guess is that they crave attention. I read one girls profile that said she gets around 200 messages a day. Yeah, I think she is getting all the attention she wants. My bet is that she barely responds to any. If she even does respond. She just feeds off of the attention, and allows her head to consistently get bigger, metaphorically speaking.

The smallest group of girls are the actual datable girls. These are the ones that are really cute(not hot...BIG difference), and likely aren't stuck up their butts. These kind of girls are genuine, and would likely reply and might even be interested, because they don't receive as much attention as they deserve making them more approachable and down to earth.

So that is more or less what you are dealing with if you are a guy and on a dating site. I think the likelihood of finding love is pretty equal to actual life. Maybe you have more of a reach, but to actually find someone that is right for you is, likely, just as much effort as finding girls in real life. Granted people do take more chances online. They are more outspoken, and have more confidence than in face to face situations. So, I guess, it really depends on what kind of person you are, and mostly what you are looking for. I have only been on the site for a few days. Maybe I should give it more time before I make any conclusive statements. If anything actually happens I will be sure to update everyone who is interested. If nothing happens, the more likely possibility, then I will likely delete my account, and completely deny that I ever had an online dating profile. Then I will continue my current approach with women and meet a lot of babes, but totally get friend zoned. There is the other possibility that I will become blind and not have to worry about physical attraction. You know what. Let's all hope for that one. I could see myself being blind. Not literally, that would be impossible, but I could imagine my life as a blind person. Never again would I have to see gorgeous women, and wish I were dead. Yeah it would get old after a while. I mean it must be pretty boring to see nothing all the time, but that is the price you pay to be happy I guess. Also, that drastically reduces the chances that someone will put a gun to my head and force me to watch Jersey Shore, Pretty Little Liars, or some other ridiculous tv show that someone would torture you with. I imagine that is what hell is like. You get there and you have 2 options. Being strapped to a bed and have acid dropping on your forehead for eternity, or having to watch a never ending marathon of one of those shows. Note to self: avoid going to hell.

Until next time,

Me